According to this yahoo article, graveyard shifts are a "probable" cause of cancer.

I'm glad that I don't work that shift anymore...who knows though, if I get fired, then maybe I'll have to do that again. But yeah, the people who I saw that worked that shift at my old workplace looked really old compared to people I saw who worked during the day.

I guess maybe I need to take better care of myself and not stay up too late anymore...

More babble

I've been staying up way too late these past few nights of vacation. So I've been waking up at 2pm. heh. Oh man...so I missed church again. I don't know what it is, but I like to stay up for some reason. I don't like to go to sleep early, even though I would feel better. Maybe it's the fact that I can't use the TV until after my parents go to sleep.

Anyway, I should be studying for the JLPT...I don't know why I keep on taking these tests if I'm not going to study...I'm thinking that I should probably not sign up for the test until I can confidently say that I can pass it way before I sign up for it. Another year of failing...

But it has been a good year though...I went to Japan to teach English and came back even though I had failed there. I got another job because of my friends and I'm somewhat content now. Maybe that's why I haven't been studying...I'm really comfortable with where I am now.

Someone told me to not get too comfortable because you'll never know what will happen in the future. So I'm thinking that if I don't improve myself, I'll be in some trouble...

I don't know what it is, but I feel like I just want to take a longer vacation. But as the holiday season approaches, that's not possible. I might be working the day after Christmas...or maybe Christmas eve or the Saturday before it...but we'll see.

I guess I have a lot to plan for in terms of where I want to be in a year...or even where I want to be in terms of my language ability in the next month. I guess instead of making goals for the year or even the long term, I need to focus more on the short term goals...day by day, to week by week, to month by month...then it might be possible to reach those long term goals. I've been stuck in the same place for 3 years now.

But anyway, I have a lot to be thankful for. I experienced new things in my life...going to Japan and living there for a good amount of time...meeting some great people, and growing a little more from my time away from my parents. God has definitely been good to me in that I do feel that I am a better person than I was a year ago...

I guess I should be better to God...

JLPT is in two weeks...man, I am not ready...but then again, I just spent an hour reading articles about the ps3...and surfing the net...and fantasy sports...and well...you get the picture. My mom asks me why I keep on signing up for these tests if I'm not going to study. She said, "you'd think signing up for the test would motivate you to study for it, but maybe you should wait until you know that you can pass the test for sure."

I don't know what it is...I don't know why I'm so unmotivated. Maybe I just don't want to do this as a career...It was so different in college though...I studied hard in Japanese...I really enjoyed it...but I think that I got overloaded...

Maybe I should look to do something else with my life...

One thing that someone said was that they hated going to Japanese school when they were young, but appreciate it so much now that they're an adult. Okay, nothing's going to happen if I keep on writing.

Dual Shock 3 for PS3, but woes for the ps3???

Apparently I saw on ebay that people were selling dual shock 3 controllers for around $70 in Japan worldwide. So I checked www.amazon.co.jp (or check this link) and saw that they are actually selling that. However, it's not in the US yet...and probably not in other countries either.

So apparently the CEO, when he was hinting that there would be a controller with vibration for the ps3 was actually serious.

So apparently from a gamespot article found here, Sony is pleading with its 3rd party developers to stay on board for the ps3. Dismal sales of the PS3 contribute to that.

In other news, Sony released a 2.0 firmware for the PS3, but it doesn't do very much. Remote turn on using your psp? And other eye candy stuff...article found here.

I'm still disappointed in the ps3 too. There aren't any good games out for it. Ninja Gaiden sigma is one, but who hasn't played that? Heavenly sword is another good one, but it's pretty short. I'm still waiting for FFXIII and White Knight. Plus for some reason, the ps3 disconnects from online play when I get some lag. And on top of that, I have to download the updates to my memory stick on my pc because the ps3 I got can't keep a connection long enough to download it directly from the wireless router. Maybe I have a defective PS3. I don't know...

Anyway, the only good games I have are on the ps2, ds, and some on the psp...which I might add is breaking up...which means I either have to buy a new one, or get it fixed...I also might add that I hardly used my psp and my directional pad on the bottom left corner is broken. On top of that also, my wireless internet for my psp isn't working either, so I can't connect.

I remember hearing about people buying the ps2 when it first came out and that it broke a year later. Now, the ps2 doesn't have that problem...but it could be that sony does make improvements over the years when they update the model. So maybe I should never buy sony products when they first come out...

Anyway, I'm curious to see if Sony can make use of its six axis controllers to make great games...but still, it's pretty early and I'm doubtful.

If they can develop great games that will be worth the wait, then I'm sure that news will spread and more ps3s will be bought. But it has been a whole year and still a lot of the games won't come out for awhile. I'm guessing ps3 sales will be low this Christmas.

Nintendo was pretty smart though...they came out with Zelda when the Wii came out and had wii sports to keep people busy until their new games come out. Sony however, didn't have any blockbuster games like that close to launch.

However, if Sony is able to come out with great games for the PS3, then I'm sure that people will be happy with it. Which is why I can see why they're pleading for developers to stay with the ps3.

Anyway, they have some great titles lined up for next year, so hopefully...hopefully...they'll do something worthwhile.

For some reason, I don't want to study for this test coming up. I already know that I'm going to fail...I've failed 2 times before at this level. I don't know what it is, but maybe I'm just too comfortable right now with where I am.

I don't know where I'll be in the future. I really should have a back up plan, (like building my Japanese skills,) but I'm so unmotivated now.

Time is passing by quickly and the test is in 2 weeks. Maybe I should find something else in terms of what I want to do. If I'm not going to put in the time to do something, then why pursue this dream of being someone who can make a living off of translating Japanese? It makes no sense.

Anyway, no matter what I do, it seems like there's this cloud hanging over me in bad memories and experiences related to studying Japanese. Maybe it's not even that, but that it's pretty dry in terms of looking stuff up constantly. Not a good sign if you're looking stuff up all the time and not understanding it on your own.

I do believe that anybody can do anything. But sometimes there's limitations to what a person can do. I guess maybe Japanese isn't for me. Maybe I'm not cut out to do Japanese as a profession. Maybe I should just work these blue collar jobs.

I do believe that if you do believe that you can do something within your bounds, then you can achieve it. I guess basketball was a good lesson for me on life. My friend told me that being good a basketball is all about practice. And without practice, you can't get any better. Anyway, some great people are people who overcame others telling them that they couldn't do something and proved them wrong. They knew that they could do it and followed through to the end when they achieved success.

I guess if I want to get any better at Japanese, I'll have to practice often...if not everyday. I can't learn this language at the rate that I'm going at now.

Maybe I'm too little too late for this year. But if I improve from my previous two scores, then I'll be happy.

Man, I really suck at scrabble...I'm getting creamed online. Well...I only play for fun, so whatever.

Anyway, the JLPT is coming up. I'm thinking I'm going to fail...but as long as I improve, I'll be happy. Maybe next year.

Sometimes I'm glad that I'm still here.

So I was playing Yu-gi-oh tag force for the psp. Man, I can see why the kids get so addicted to these games. But still, one thing that kind of bothered me was that if you have a crappy deck, then you'll always lose. Buying new cards is a must, but it's all luck in what cards you get. I can't imagine playing this as a real card game, because there's so many cards and I can't keep track of all of them.

One thing that I didn't like either was that it's not like an rpg in any sense of the word. You don't whittle away your opponent's monster's health, you just knock them out. Unless you get a card that does take their health away. Basically it's like a card game, highest value wins.

I think that this game and puzzle quest will be sitting on my shelf for awhile. I kind of think that card games and puzzle games are just not my cup of tea.

Anyway, maybe I'm outgrowing video games. Well, at least I didn't get sucked into WoW. After watching my former roommate do poorly in classes from Evercrack, I vowed never to get into that stuff. heh. Nerd talk...oh man...

Anyway, yeah, to think all the hours I spent playing video games...the only people who ever benefited from video games are the people who win those video game tournaments...however, many of the other people are living in their parents' basement.

i wonder exactly what's going to happen if I take responsibility and do something worthwhile. We'll see though...it might never happen...but I can't think about tomorrow...I've got to do what I can today.

Lately, I've been feeling really low. I've wondered why I'm here on this earth again...and I'm wondering why the heck am I feeling this way?

The reason, after praying and talking to God, was that I realized that a some people were critical of me or criticizing me. Like today, basketball practice was today and I was feeling horrible today...my dad would always ask me..."Why did you join this basketball team?" It always made me feel worse when we lost, because he seemed like he was saying to himself...I'm right. Maybe he wasn't saying anything like that, but that's how I felt these past two months.

This wasn't the only thing that's been going on, but some other people have been getting on my case. And I can't escape anywhere from their presence.

What I think God told me during this time of prayer was that people will always be critical of you...and you can't help that. But you've got to be happy with who you are and see the good things inside of you. And if you desire change, you can work with God to become a better person.

It always helps me to find my place in God, because He does put things into the right perspective. In the cloudiness, He is the beacon of light that guides me to where I should be.

it makes me wonder why the heck I didn't do this earlier... Maybe I've been too busy chasing after other things.

Anyway, I've been sick with this cold for a month now...and I haven't gotten better. Maybe I should see a doctor, but I think that I can overcome this illness. I don't feel too terribly bad, but it is pretty annoying not being at 100 percent.

Well...whatever...I know that God can do a great thing in me if I work with Him to accomplish that.

So yeah, I do feel healed a little bit...anyway, got to go